Promise..

well.. raining day..should be a good timing for me to sleep more since i got the appointment only at 3pm.
Unfortunately..have to wake up in the early morning around 7.45am (even i am not willing to do so)because already promised someone to go for breakfast..

PROMISE..
what does promise mean??? (from Oxford)

1st => (verb)Promise sth (to sb)
to tell sb that you will definately do or not do sth, or that sth will
definately happen
2nd => a statement that tells sb that you will definately do or not do sth

So is there anyone in the world fully understand the meaning of PROMISE and really comply it? hmmm hmmm... I don't think so.. How about you?? Are you the one who always break the promise? Don't you know that a PROMISE is actually show the respect to yourself and another one?? Don't you know that sometime a simple PROMISE will be exerted a strong influence on someone??
So my dearest peers.. Please .. Try your very best not to break a PROMISE to someone you care or care of you..
Sorry that i am very particular in this. I am always trying my best to fulfil the promises to anyone in my life.. Especially the one in my heart -- you.. you know that i'll be always here for you right? Atleast this is what i can promise you.. okay ???

你，仿佛有点遥不可及。。。。但，我还是想放肆的坚持对你的感觉。。 。
哪怕不能长相厮守，但愿我就曾经有那么的一段时间---认真地爱过你。。。

Pull myself out from you but drowned into YOU

Well.. Confusing situation ..

Try to get rid of you.. Finally I DID it.. very well..
One harsh word sent me into the depths of despair..
A despairing cry after the harsh word..
No hard feeling but just an act of sheer desperation..
Don't worry.. I am fine.. Always.. =)
No more expectation from you..
No longer moody because of you..

To YOU,
Heartbreak when I got a clear statement from you which Asking me not to spend / waste time on it..
I want to do so!!
I do it willingly!!
For YOU, It could be a feeling of doubt and uncertainty..
I had no reason to doubt YOU upon the doubt from YOU to ME.
I accepted it..
Just believe that Definite answer will be disclosed one day..
Not going to worry about it..

Feeling good now..and i believe the good feeling will be last continually untill the day.. The day we Meet..


Mandy

AGAIN.............

I'm lost.. AGAIN.. These two days.. Try my best not to think of you after broke up.. Doing well in first two to three weeks... Till the past saturday.. Keep on thinking of you.. You are figuring in my head!! Made me lost.. Couldnt work again.. Affected by you again.. Mood going down again.. Why?? Why am i like this?? Why?? Could you tell me why?? ........ Tell me please.. Am i going to fall for you again??? Am i going to carry relationship with you again?? Am i going to GET HURT AGAIN??
Sighs...........................

............

Finally,

You gave up.
You made a choice indeed although you didn't state clearly.
You left.

I realised.
I understood.
I let go.

I was just a fool along the way. Just realised when you already decided to love a person fully you'll get hurt.

* We make them cry who care for us.
* We care for those who never care for us.
* And we care for those who will never cry for us.


By,
person who get hurt deeply

LOVE....( YOU are the one I LOVE )

To the one I LOVE,

What's LOVE??
LOVE is amazing.
LOVE is suffering.
LOVE is sweet.
LOVE is bitter.
LOVE can change a person's personality.
LOVE can bring happiness.
LOVE need communication.
LOVE need forgiveness.
LOVE need understanding.
LOVE need ME and YOU.

No matter how far is our distance,
No matter how others disagree with us,
No matter how we suffer,

I will still LOVE YOU truly from my heart.
It's true! Please never ever doubt on ME.
Please OPEN your HEART and let me FLY toward you.
DON'T BE AFRAID. STRESS FREE..I AM ALWAYS HERE FOR YOU.

PLEASE give me a chance to LOVE you.
I will TRY MY BEST to work out the relationship with you. WILL YOU do the same too???


I LOVE YOU
I NEED YOU
I MISS YOU


By,
Mandy

Finany I was unable to suppress my depression..

Still managed to calm myself while in the meeting just now. Online after came back to home. Viewed facebook and saw that again. DAMN SHIT feeling.. It's HURT you know??

Finally, TEARS keep rolling dowm my face.. HEART really painful.. Do you know that?? You HURT me silently but deeply.. I was accepting silently but painfully all along.. I really don't hope to annoy you actually but I just don't know whether I should or shouldnt voice out. I just don't hope to be like your ex who keep on annoying and suspecting you.. I DIDN'T.. seriously.. I TRUST YOU all along the way. BUT do you know that your behavior will hurt me sometimes? Did you think of my feeling while doing all these??
I was deeply HURT because of I was busy doing this and that here to make sure our bright future but you're there to do something regardless about my feeling.. Can't you be just understanding?? Can't you think of whether will you hurt me if do this??

Sometimes I will think of "NEVER MIND".. just forget about it and left unsaid.. BUT will this way work? Will you appreciate with what I have done with keeping silent and let you have FREEDOM? I am not going to control you but just atleast think of me before anything happen. Ok?? What I expect is just that simple. Anyway, take care.

By,
Mandy

I felt very depressed..

Just back from work. Had been standing for 5 hours to promote the credit cards. I was really depressed the whole day but I still had to treat the customers nicely. Smiled gently to them although got rejected. BUT my heart was bleeding indeed. Try not to think of the issue while working but it's just beyond my control.. Keep figuring in my mind.. My eyes filled with tears while this happened but I still had to control myself and make sure that the tear won't roll down my face.

HURT!!... SPEECHLESS!!!.... SILENT!!!!........

Being silent is a bad attitude? Being "don't mind" is suffering? Why don't you be understanding with my SILENCE? Why I keep on maintaining a proper distance with others BUT you don't?? Am I complaining right now?? Are you beginning to get annoyed with what I feel??

Haiz.. Just forget about it. Maybe I just don't have the right to control or disturb YOUR PERSONAL LIFE.

I THINK IT CAN ONLY TAKE SOME TIME FOR THE WOUNDS TO HEAL. That's it !!!

By,
Mandy

21st March 2009

Has been stopped for 2 months to blog here. Damn busy and really didn't have mood to blog too.. I think most of the people(all around the world)also don't have mood in this recent because of recession. A lot of people are facing retrenchment nowadays. ME?? Hmmm.. Not consider jobless but just having a low income right now.

FEAR!! Afraid of cant cover the monthly expenses. + I am now really under pressure.. From my parents. They keep on mentioning about MONEY in front of me.. DAMN SHIT.. I hate it. But what to do?? They are still my parents indeed. There is just a thing figuring in my head right now-- earn money as soon as possible and also as much as possible then purchase a new house and move out. Atleast I can still breathe after come back from work.

In another hand, I am now still have to take care of someone. Haiz.. Don't know what to say la.. Just having a bad mood now.. hu~~~~ speechless........................

love,
Mandy Tan

Forget about the "PAST".. Welcome the "PRESENT"..

23.01.09

I got in the first accident since the day I start to drive. Knocked down a motorcyclist. Wasted lots of time to settle the case. Brought him to clinic for injection. Asked mechanic to repair his motor. Sent him back to home while my friend was riding his motor at my back. Spent almost RM300 to settle with him. Finally close case or else I will be in trouble for sometime.

24.01.09

(swee chin)Thanks for assisting me to send him for massage. Sorry to wake you up so early..
(wooi leong)Received Paul's call in the afternoon. Had been told by him that leong involved in an accident as well. Gosh.. Luckily that was a small case. No one get injure.

~ DEAR ~
Went to Prangin to meet her. Asked her a question. But She seemed answer thoughtlessly. Then I doubt on her Indeed I was damn nervous. Finally I got the answer which I expected. wawawawa.... So happy.. Can be describe as EXCITED..
Went to Penang Hill (haven't been there for ages). View was nice. Mood was good. Everything was fine. I do hope I can start my life in a strong spirit in this new year. With your support,I believe I can be succeed in one day. Let's us forget about the past, the unhappiness and work hard together. Love you endlessly..

with love,
Ling Ling

My 2009 GOAL

Just went back from Gopeng, Perak. I went there with my agency - TEAMWORK AGENCY.. It could consider as a 2 day 1 night life camp for us to do annual planning for 2009.

First of all, I would like to introduce to you all that we were staying at My Gopeng Resort. It's really a natural place.. No pollution at all.. The owner built a few ATAP HOUSES in this JUNGLE just to let you stay. You'll feel cold most of the times especially when the wind was blowing.

All of us made our 2009 GOAL perfectly under such good condition. My goal is to hit 160k personal sales because I hope to entitle for tier 1 trip which is going to Madrid,SPAIN. This is the country which I always hope to go. So I have to really work out this year already. Anyway, I'll try my best to achieve it. I do hope all of our GOAL can achieve in this year.

Actually there is another GOAL in my heart. Consider a long term goal. That's hoping "YOU" to come back to me.. Really..

With Love,
Ling Ling